If you’ve wandered around Baden-Württemberg you might have seen signs that read: Wir können alles. Außer Hochdeutsch.

Say what?

Translated, that means: We can do anything, expect speak Standard German.

What, they don’t speak German in Germany? Is this a joke? Maybe you thought you lost your marbles.

It’s more complicated than just speaking German in Germany—we speak High German, West Low German, East Low German, East Frisian, Low Saxon, Upper Sorbian, Lower Sorbian, Lower Silesian, Swabian, Baden, etc etc…

Whew, that’s a whole lotta language going on.

Just so you’re aware, not all the languages spoken in Germany are derived from German. Nope, over in Lower Lusatia, for example, you’ll hear (or read, since signs are bilingual) Lower Sorbian, which is based on a Slavic language.

Upper Sorbian is spoken by around 40,000 people in Upper Lusatia, which is an area found within Saxony (and cities like Bautzen).

And in Lower Saxony, almost a quarter of million people speak East Frisian (also called East Frisian-Low Saxon), which kind of sounds like Dutch. Hmm, these are the tea drinking folks of the country (unlike most of the coffee devouring rest of the country)—so why not speak something else, right? ;-)

West Low German is the biggie, spoken by around 4 million people. You’ll hear this dialect in Hamburg, parts of Schleswig-Holstein, Saxony-Anhalt, North Rhine-Westphalia, and even Denmark.

Doesn’t it seem like we’re all over the map? Yeah, it should—because just about everywhere in Germany, someone’s speaking another language, it seems.

I have to admit, it was the Lower and Upper Silesian that had me confused. Upper Silesian doesn’t have German roots (it has Polish beginnings), while Lower Silesian (spoken by around 23,000 people) does.

Maybe Germany’s motto should be that we can speak everything, PLUS Standard German. ;-)

Gag. Ick. Um, excuse me. I’m trying to hold down my lunch as I type this. Shouldn’t have been digging around that site, so I guess it’s my own fault.

I’ll be the first one to sing the praises of fine German cuisine from the rooftops. But, bugs? That’s a bit much for me.

It isn’t, however, for a man by the name of Thomas Knack. He decided to sell all sorts of (dare I say it?) bugs for sale on his German website Braidy Snack.

German health officials kind of had a cow (do you blame them?). Yet to be fair, to Herr Knack dung beetles, scorpions, grubs, and spiders have long been sold in places like exotic Thailand, as well as plenty other towns & cities across the Pacific, Asia, and South America.

Mr. Knack and scientists state that bugs are full of vitamins and plenty of protein. Bamboo worms are said to taste like ham. I say, why not just eat the ham? And grasshoppers have a flavor like chicken. Again, give me the chicken.

You don’t have to order your grubs online; you can stop in at the Weinkeller on Linienstrasse 147, Berlin—just in case you can’t wait for your, aack, insecty treat to arrive in the mail.

Ugh, I can’t believe I’m writing this. ;-)

Doesn’t a fine Cannibal Sandwich (meat, onions, mustard on rye bread) sound better? Yeah, I’ll take that over some grass moth munchies any day of the week.

It’s no wonder that Mr. Knack has had a hard time getting local folks to try his wares. This is a land of Black Forest Ham and Black Forest Cake (made with delicious cherries, not crunchy cooties).

I’m also pretty sure that Andrew Zimmern on his Bizarre Foods Blog didn’t mention all these crawly delicacies when he came to Germany. I’d like to think I would have remembered that. But, I could be wrong, since I’m so inclined to tune out when bugs are involved.

What do you think? Does the bug treat thing sound like it could make its way into German cuisine?

Nah, bug (I mean, but) good luck to Mr. Knack for trying.

You can probably tell when I’m hungry, because it seems like that when I write blogs on Germany’s most amazing cuisine.

So where’s the place that piqued my culinary interest this time?

Bavaria, my friends, good ol’ Bavaria.

Bavaria is a pretty big place, and it’s known for three types of regional dishes—Franconian, traditional Bavarian, and Swabian.

Since Swabia encompasses parts of Baden-Württemberg, I’m only going to give you the scoop on some of the best of Franconia and traditional Bavaria.

Franconia

It’s not uncommon to see both Rotkraut and Weisskraut served as a side dish to schnitzel or potato dumplings. Rotkraut (that’s the red stuff) is a bit sweeter than the white (I mean green cabbage), so expect it when you eat it.

Spargel (asparagus) is also common in Franconian cooking; and you’ll find it on a menu from April to June. It’s chocked full of vitamins and minerals, so not only is the “king’s veggie” delicious—it’s good for you too.

The Knieküchle isn’t all that great for you (it’s a deep fried sweet bread), but oh is it simply divine. A nice way to end a meal, I must say.

Traditional Bavarian Cuisine

Sure, you’ve heard of the pretzel—well thanks to Bavaria, this has become a modern day snack. However, that’s not the only contribution the region has given to the world.

Ever heard of apple strudel? Of course you have! This is a yummy dessert made with apples, cinnamon, and often rum. Oh, that’s why I like it so much. ;-)

But, before you have dessert you got to eat something normal, right? Try Wiener Schnitzel or Schweine (pork) Schnitzel. My Italian-American friends call it a cutlet, but I ain’t splittin’ hairs, OK?

For a starter, try the simple yet delicious Kartoffelsuppe, a potato soup made with bacon, onion, celery, and carrots.

If you’ve come to Munich you might have heard people talking about Weisswurst. This is a sausage that has its own set of “rules” to eat it by—never after noon (and I mean precisely at noon), never consumed with a knife & fork (use your hands), and mustard is generally the only acceptable condiment. Although…

I am one of those who willingly and frequently dismisses these rules…

If I wasn’t hungry before, I certainly am now. I think I better go get a schnitzel and some apple strudel before I eat my keyboard.

And the next time I get hungry—I’ll bring you another blog post on German cuisine, OK?

Germany has been a leader in innovations for centuries, but now there’s a meter to measure whether you’re full of manure. Oh, isn’t that just a nice way of saying that you very well might be full of…

Nevermind, this is a family-oriented website.

Writers (of German or English) beware, because leave it to us no-nonsense Germans to come up with a website (www.Blablameter.com) that’ll “rate” your words for its level of bull.

If you’re used to using big words (I call them dollar-fifty words), or “bombastic phrases” then you’re sure to score over a “1.” That just a nice way of saying you’re full of hot-air.

Yeah, that’s a nice way to put it.

I did a little homework myself, just so you know, copying a number of articles on German Cities that I scanned through the website. I’m happy to report not a one that I submitted scored the dreaded 1 (or higher). YES!

Blablameter isn’t the only new thing to come out of Germany lately. Lufthansa, Germany’s national airline, is testing a new biofuel on flights from Frankfurt to Hamburg. And the Technical University Munich is working on an affordable electric car (called the Mute).

Innovation that’s eco-friendly. I like it.

The Mute and biofuel aren’t the only ways that innovation and earth-responsible behavior come together. The Deutsche Bahn just signed a renewable energy deal. Even better!

Did I mention that Google’s funding (more than 4 million Euro) a new institute in Berlin, get this, on the Internet’s impact?

OK, maybe this isn’t eco-friendly, but it very well be socially-responsible.

Don’t laugh at all these new gadgets, websites, or studies—Germany’s been at the forefront of inventions for over 500 years.

Did you know that toothpaste, teabags, and coffee filters were all invented by Germans?

I know I’ll be giving thanks to these folks after I’ve brushed my minty fresh teeth and have a cup of grindless filled coffee (which I have time to drink since I don’t have to worry about my words here at MyGermanCity.com being full of hot air). ;-)

Yeah there are a lot of pages on MyGermanCity.com that have to do with our good ol’ German history. But, if you’re reading this thinking you’re going to find something out about Dark Ages (that period in history between the fall of the Roman Empire and the Middle Ages) this ain’t it.

This is all about superstitions and Old Wives’ Tales from Germany that have something to do with everything from cleaning to warding off the Devil. And I have to thank D. L. Ashliman for providing us with a great list of Superstitions from Germany.

One disclaimer though, some of these might seem downright sexist or plain odd, but I got a good chuckle out of ’em… and a few I do myself, without ever understanding why. Until now. ;-)

One is that it’s not good to kill spiders, which I do not do, because spiders eat other bugs—so by killing them, you’re increasing other creepy-crawly critters. (Well, thinking about it, it’s actually not a superstition… it’s a fact; so let’s cancel that one.)

Another states that if a stork builds a nest on your roof (or chimney) it’s an omen for a long, wealthy life.

Uh, can someone coax a stork to do that on my house, please? ;-)

And while people seem to think that just touching a chimney sweep is good luck, Germans know you actually got to shake hands with him for the luck to rub off on you.

One superstition that has to do with your home is to bring bread and salt as a housewarming gift so that the owners will never go hungry. How thoughtful.

Here’s a creepy one… Rainwater from a tombstone removes freckles. Since I don’t have freckles, I haven’t tried it to see if it works. Another creepy one is to wash the clothes of the recently deceased—otherwise they won’t rest in peace.

While some superstitions are meant to bring luck, some are meant to keep bad luck from happening.

Guys, whatever you do, don’t walk between two old women in the morning—it’s supposed to make your whole day be sour with bad luck.

And Ladies, if you’ve given birth in the last six weeks—you’re not to be left alone; because this is when the Devil has the most power over you. Also, you’re not supposed to answer any question a witch might ask you—it’s said she’ll take something from you.

With any good luck, she’ll take away any bad luck you’ve got. ;-)

Bottom line with all those superstitions? For me, if you believe that a certain superstition is true, then it is true for you. And if you don’t believe in them then they’re not true for you.

I think it was my lovely neighbors (the French) that kicked off this tirade. They sure were mad when Cologne’s Anuga Food Show (an annual event in October) said that foie gras wasn’t allowed.

Oh boy, were they mad.

What’s the big deal about foie gras? Isn’t it a luxury food like caviar?

Yeah, except the practice of making geese or ducks binge eat like they got bulimia (without the evacuating part of it) to fatten their livers is now a heated debate.

Lots of people out there don’t eat certain meats because of handling practices (one person I know doesn’t eat veal because of how they’re treated).

But, whether our French friends are up in arms over whether foie gras was allowed or not, rest assured that there are a variety of other food festivals and shows that don’t include eating fat duck liver.

Food Fairs & Festivals in Germany

January is a big month for food shows. One of the biggest is the International Green Week in Berlin. Actually, it’s a food, agriculture, and horticulture show (2012 date: January 20-29).

Just as Berlin’s show ends, the Sweets & Biscuits Fair kicks off in Cologne, which is all about new trends in confectionery delights. Who cares, bring on the chocolate—FAST!

Berlin’s at it again with the Freshconex Fair, that’s all about the juiciest, freshest, yummiest produce (salads, juices) you can find. I guess you better go if you want a healthy option after hittin’ up the sweets fair.

Munich is not to be outdone—their response is the Starkbierzeit (Strong Beer Week). Yes, I’m aware that this 2-week festival (kicking off around March 19) in the middle of Lent is about the beer. But, I did have to give it an honorable mention.

And don’t confuse this with Bavarian Beer Day that’s the official start to Bavarian Beer Week.

Now do you understand why I make jokes about Bavaria and beer all the time?

Anyway, Bavarian Beer Day kicks off on April 23 in honor of the date that a Bavarian Duke decreed the Beer Purity Law in 1516.

One of the biggest festivals is the Bad Dürkheim Sausage and Wine Festival in Bad Dürkheim. It might seem like it’s all about the wine (150 varieties available) but the Wurstmarkt is about the sausage. This festival is so popular (with fireworks) it takes place over 2 weekends (2nd & 3rd weekends in September). Make new friends while you’re sampling some great vino at a Schubkärchler, a small wine stand.

It’s back to Bavaria for one of the biggest food festivals in the country, Oktoberfest.

Stop laughing! Oktoberfest might be where more than 7 million liters of beer are consumed during the 16-day festival, but lots of local specialties are eaten during the event too. Try some Hendl (it’s chicken so don’t be alarmed), some roast pork dishes, Kasspatzn (cheese noodles), Weisswurst, and/or Obatzda.

Look, you better eat while you’re drinking—otherwise you’ll be what we call a Bierleiche (a “beer corpse”), all passed out in an Oktoberfest Beer Tent.

Who’s laughing now? :-)

Starting back in 2008 Germany has been getting ready for the 500th anniversary of the Reformation on October 31, 2017. Yes, that’s right it’s an event ten years in the making, six years to go still.

Each year leading up to the epic event has all sorts of symposiums, festivals, movies, and other events in villages and towns that were important places in the life Martin Luther. A most remarkable man, if I do say so myself.

What is also remarkable are the folks who’ve created this decade long event, have even implemented theme years; each with their own special events. Stat tuned with me, I’ll keep you posted about many of the events throughout the upcoming years.

If you’re going to make your way through many of the towns that were instrumental in the Protestant Reformation sweeping Germany, you better make sure you’re here for a while.

I would start in the town of Wittenberg, where it all started. It was here in Wittenberg at the Castle Church that Martin nailed his 95-theses to the door looking for, well, reform of the Catholic Church.

No, scratch that. I guess it all started in Eisleben where he was born. Then again, Erfurt is where he lived as a monk, so here’s a town that was instrumental in the shaping of Luther’s life.

Some other places in the life of Luther weren’t so much as important in his work, as in his early life. He went to school in Magdeburg and lived in Mansfeld for a time.

Whichever route you choose to follow, like (but not limited to) the Lutherweg or the Luther Pilgerweg, it doesn’t really matter because the Center for Spiritual Tourism in Thuringia (it opened on July 3, 2011) is here to help you along the way.

I don’t think you need to be on some spiritual quest to enjoy the events of the Luther Decade. No, even if all you do is enjoy it for history’s sake; you’ll certainly learn quite a bit about the man who changed history and influenced the lives of millions of people.

What’s a medieval castle or two without a ghost or two? What’s a creepy graveyard without a few ectoplasmic ghouls to be seen?

So, in honor of All Hallow’s Eve (or Halloween)—although barely celebrated in Germany—I’m about to give you skinny on the creepiest, scariest, hair-raising sites in all of Germany.

If you’re faint of heart you might choose to change to another page on The Germany Blog. If not, then don’t say I didn’t warn you. ;-)

In case you’re wondering, yes Frankenstein Castle has made the list. And, this is only a fraction of the haunted places found throughout the country.

Berlin’s Pfauen Insel Park has been said to be haunted by a black ghost with glowing red eyes. Yikes, I’m scared already.

Over at the old Nazi Hospital (at the Conn Barracks in Schweinfurt) it’s been said that the ghost of a Nazi soldier has haunted the area for years.

Heidelberg’s Amphitheater and Hexenturm also said to be visited by strange noises and ghostly apparitions, especially on moonless nights.

Yeah, I know none of these places is a haunted castle — don’t worry, I’m getting to them right now.

One of the biggest haunted sites in Germany is Eltz Castle, where the spirits of medieval Knights have been known to roam. The castle closes for the winter season on November 1st, but at least it’s open for the scariest of all the holidays.

Hmm, it’s time for the most famous name in scary stories — Frankenstein Castle. No, there isn’t some large guy with bolts sticking out his neck here; it’s said to be the ghost of Johann Dippel.

The ghost at Friedland Castle is thought to be the daughter of a former resident, who was “cursed” by her own dad. Wow, that’s a scary thought.

I think Reichenstein Castle would be scarier than Burg Frankenstein or Friedland Castle. Why? Because it is said to be haunted by the ghosts of not one, not two, not even five ghosts — but ten! Just so you know, they’re believed to be the spirits of robber baron Dietrich von Hohenfels and his nine sons.

If you’ve come across any super creepy sites within Germany, let me know so I can come back to visit them next Halloween.

Yeah, sure, the United States have some national parks that’ll knock your proverbial socks off (Yosemite and Yellowstone to name a couple). But, did you know that Germany also has some famous ones; and not so famous ones?

Because I’m German, I love lists (an order for everything, I must say). This is why I’ve made a list of some of my faves of Germany’s National Parks (besides the Black Forest, which I did not list below since I guess you all know by now that the Schwarzwald is my top favorite of all). This way, while you’re here you can enjoy the family-friendliest, most economical, a downright prettiest countryside on the planet.

Sorry, Yellowstone, you’re gorgeous too.

Bavarian Forest National Park

The Bavarian Forest is 243 square kilometers that stretches eastward all the way to the Czech Republic’s Bohemian Forest National Park. With 300km of hiking trails, 200km of cycling paths, and 80km of cross-country skiing lanes, there’s no possible way you’ll ever say or hear the words: I’m bored.

Harz National Park

The mountainous Harz region in both Lower Saxony and Saxony-Anhalt has wild boars, woodpeckers, and hundreds of other kinds of wildlife living in it. Add in cave exploration and a ride on the 130km narrow-gauge railway, and you’ve got an excellent adventure to say the least.

Schleswig-Holstein Wadden Sea National Park

One word: mudflats. Yes, mudflats. Mudflat hiking is booming here — and there’s not much to it. Get yourself a guide to fill you in on the low tide schedule, then walk out on the terra firma that was just covered by the water.

As if hiking the mudflats isn’t enough, try to find all 3,000 species of animal that lives within this park’s boundaries, take a boat cruise, or enjoy the rustic simplicity of a small fishing village.

Saxon Switzerland National Park

No, Saxony does not border the country of Switzerland — that’s just its name. It’s called Saxon Switzerland due to the mountainous landscape.

But, I don’t think you’ll care when you’re off hiking around the rock formations, valley, or gorges. Dresden isn’t too far away, so starting from there makes getting to this park remarkably simple.

Hainich National Park

Forested woodlands makes this Thuringian landscape look as if it came straight from the pages of a storybook. Guided tours can take you to find everything from mushrooms to a thousand-year old Oak tree, or you can choose to follow the Rennsteig (Thuringia’s oldest hiking trail) or see Wartburg Castle all on your own.

These are some of my favorite picks, and I’m pretty sure that you’ll love them too.

Oh yeah, you’ve got your vacation time set, and Germany’s on the itinerary! Except one thing, how you getting there?

Now I don’t want to suggest one airline over the other, except that Lufthansa is the largest German airline (and one of the largest worldwide).

Oh, and the best part? They’re offering that new Airbus A380 for service from Frankfurt Airport to Singapore, Miami, San Francisco, New York (JFK), Johannesburg, Beijing, and Tokyo.

Whew, that’s a long list. Ain’t it grand, my international friends!?!

Most people aren’t able to fly either Business or First Class (although I know how to save a whopping 70 – 90% on the usual ticket prices), but I got to tell… the First and Business Class seats in this A380 aircraft are AWESOME!

In First Class there’s a seat that’ll stretch out to just about 2 meters with 17-inch video screens, a constant humidity level that won’t dry out your skin (women of the world, rejoice).

First Class offers privacy screens in case you don’t want to “be bothered” by your seat mate or anyone else for that matter. Plus, the cabin is made with materials to reduce noise (yeah, cause jet engines are known to be “quiet” ;-).

Unfortunately, the seats don’t recline to a fully flat position in Business Class (yet), but just about. Oohh, comfortable—even if you’re a bit taller than the almost 2 meter seat! This class takes up the entire upper deck of this super huge wide-body aircraft, which is pretty cool if you ask me.

Meals in either First or Business are a scrumptious affair (keep in mind I am talking about airline food) with fine wines and plenty of snacks.

People in Economy Class will find they got a little more leg room than in other aircrafts; mostly because of thinner seat backs. Don’t worry, you’ll eat fairly well in Economy Class as well.

As with any aircraft on Lufthansa you’re able to order special meals to accommodate any kind of dietary issue (low-fat, kosher, diabetic). You get the point, right? Besides, German food on the German airline can be a precursor to the awesome dishes you’ll find once you land.

So, I guess I’m saying fly Lufthansa for the best German experience—before you even arrive!